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Jason v. Melissa

Discussion of non-quizbowl topics
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MissCae
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Jason v. Melissa

Post by MissCae » Wed Nov 17, 2004 12:57 pm

Okay, since Jason brought this up and contends he would win, I thought I'd make a poll and see what the popular opinion is.

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L-Town Expatriate
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Post by L-Town Expatriate » Wed Nov 17, 2004 2:59 pm

Seeing as that I'd be more worried about you totaling someone if they called you a fish (as opposed to Mueller's mere repeating "I'm not a fish!") you'd win handily.

Plus who's ever heard of a national powerhouse in Lincoln?

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Post by mujason » Wed Nov 17, 2004 3:36 pm

Would this duel be on a MSHSAA packet, an NAQT packet, a CBI packet, or an ACF packet? Anyway, Melissa, if you're ever in Columbia (doesn't your sister live here?), I'll take you on for a friendly match.

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Post by DavidH » Wed Nov 17, 2004 4:35 pm

>>>

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Post by DavidH » Wed Nov 17, 2004 4:36 pm

>>>

MissCae
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Post by MissCae » Wed Nov 17, 2004 5:02 pm

Hey, I did pretty good playing against you guys (Savannah) after camp this year. As for this whole rust factor, if I had two weeks to study my old notebook and practice a little, the "rust" would be gone, believe me. (By the way David, whatever happened to solidarity??) And yes, I am sure I could whip him in a real fight.

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Post by DavidH » Wed Nov 17, 2004 5:09 pm

Most likely true. At your prime I will give that you could probably beat just about anyone. I wasn't meaning to be rude. Sorry if it came off that way.

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Post by mujason » Wed Nov 17, 2004 5:35 pm

Well, of course I'd lose a real physical fight (especially if she was using her ancestor's Civil War sword). Anyway, Melissa, come on down to Columbia and take me on; heck, we can even go for dinner and a movie afterward (loser buys, of course).

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Post by DeckardCain » Wed Nov 17, 2004 6:24 pm

mujason wrote: loser buys, of course
Well, at least you're a gentleman










:D

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Post by mujason » Wed Nov 17, 2004 6:49 pm

Yes, I am a gentleman, a competitive one, but a gentleman nonetheless. And to think I've been single for over three and a half years.

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Post by L-Town Expatriate » Wed Nov 17, 2004 7:33 pm

mujason wrote: Yes, I am a gentleman, a competitive one, but a gentleman nonetheless. And to think I've been single for over three and a half years.
Good luck... :rolleyes:

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Post by DavidH » Wed Nov 17, 2004 8:21 pm

Settle down Cassanever.

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Post by mujason » Wed Nov 17, 2004 8:53 pm

Casanever? That's not very nice.

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Post by MissCae » Wed Nov 17, 2004 9:16 pm

Jason, how the heck do you know all this stuff about me (my sister, the sword)? Don't you have anything else to do besides googling my name? And sorry, I won't be coming down to Columbia anytime soon, I have papers to write. I didn't think you were being rude, David, just making sure you stuck up for an alumnus . . . wait, that includes Greg Martin, scratch that last comment.

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Post by L-Town Expatriate » Wed Nov 17, 2004 9:53 pm

MissCae wrote: Jason, how the heck do you know all this stuff about me (my sister, the sword)? Don't you have anything else to do besides googling my name?
Apparently he knows all of Brian Baker's stats from high school... and they never played against each other until college.

Jason, I don't have a TV in my room anymore. Has Joan's new friend finally found a way to kill herself yet? According to the promos, last week was a second trip to the hospital.

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Post by mujason » Wed Nov 17, 2004 10:59 pm

Question one: I read Melissa's xanga once and I have a good memory.
Question two: I saw part of last week's JOA (I was assembling packets at the time) and I think her new friend died of a knife attack or something (I'm not sure; I wasn't paying much attention).

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Post by Ramza Goltana » Thu Nov 18, 2004 6:46 pm

Meliissa, Solidarity fell apart after the fall of communism in Poland, duh. Go cry to Lek Walessa.

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L-Town Expatriate
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Post by L-Town Expatriate » Thu Nov 18, 2004 9:31 pm

mujason wrote:Question two:  I saw part of last week's JOA (I was assembling packets at the time) and I think her new friend died of a knife attack or something (I'm not sure; I wasn't paying much attention).
Brilliant. Another funeral. Just what Joan needs.
Didn't her grandma (played by Cloris "Death to King Lou-aaaeee!" Leachman) die earlier this year?

Oh, and Joan has an online diary now. Goodie...
http://www.cbs.com/primetime/joan_of_ar ... 1112.shtml

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Post by jmatthew » Sat Dec 02, 2006 3:01 am

I would say Jason has as much of a chance of dating Melissa as Greg Martin. Considering that I've never heard of Jason, I would pick Melissa. I've never heard of Lincoln either. You've got 2 strikes. You've got one left hit and you have to hit a homer to win this contest.

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Post by mujason » Sat Dec 02, 2006 11:34 am

You want a home run, punk? I led Class 2 in scoring in 2000 and 2001 (team finished second to Richland both years). That 95 tossups in 2001 is still the Class 2 record (and that was with 2 games against Richland). Here's some college stats:
NAQT Nationals:
Freshman Year: Division II All-Star, team finished ninth.
Sophomore Year: Division I #14 scorer, team placed 28th
Junior Year: Division I #15 scorer, team placed tied for 30th
TRASH (pop culture):
Sophomore Year: team won regional, team placed 14th at nationals, I was in the middle of the pack in individual scoring nationally.
Senior Year: Led Region in scoring, team placed 3rd at regional.
CBI:
Led region in scoring 3 times with 70+ PPG each time.
75 PPG in 2004 is highest regional scoring average in the past three years.
CBI Stats
Also was high individual scorer at several other tournaments.

I just went yard on you. How's it feel, Branca?

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Post by scphilli » Sat Dec 02, 2006 12:24 pm

mujason wrote: You want a home run, punk? I led Class 2 in scoring in 2000 and 2001 (team finished second to Richland both years). That 95 tossups in 2001 is still the Class 2 record (and that was with 2 games against Richland). Here's some college stats:
NAQT Nationals:
Freshman Year: Division II All-Star, team finished ninth.
Sophomore Year: Division I #14 scorer, team placed 28th
Junior Year: Division I #15 scorer, team placed tied for 30th
TRASH (pop culture):
Sophomore Year: team won regional, team placed 14th at nationals, I was in the middle of the pack in individual scoring nationally.
Senior Year: Led Region in scoring, team placed 3rd at regional.
CBI:
Led region in scoring 3 times with 70+ PPG each time.
75 PPG in 2004 is highest regional scoring average in the past three years.
CBI Stats
Also was high individual scorer at several other tournaments.

I just went yard on you. How's it feel, Branca?
ROWR!!! MUELLER ANGRY!!! MUST CRUSH ... KILL ... DESTROY ... PUNY MORTAL WHO REVIVED TWO YEAR OLD THREAD! MUELLER SMASH! SMASH MUELLER SLEEPY ... Sleepy .... sleepy ... sleezzzzzzzzzzz

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Post by LibertyMarie » Sat Dec 02, 2006 2:32 pm

yikes! I didn't know he was still around and kicking!

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Post by mujason » Sat Dec 02, 2006 4:14 pm

I kick when I have to. I'll probably get back in the saddle for CBI this January (campus tournament) and February (regionals @ Mizzou). Probably nothing else, though, as the club died during my year off from school and I can't round up a team to play anywhere with us paying expenses out of pocket.

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Post by East Buc & UMR » Sat Dec 02, 2006 4:21 pm

didn't they die when you took money from the club and those two kids kicked you out of office?

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Post by mujason » Sat Dec 02, 2006 4:39 pm

The club almost died, but it managed to recover. Also, that reference to taking money from the club should say "used virtually every penny of club funds to attend NAQT ICT and TRASHionals."

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Post by scphilli » Sat Dec 02, 2006 4:41 pm

To return this thread to the spirit in which it was created: Melissa's is bigger and she doesn't even have a Y-chromosome, which is further remarkable. Jason's (much like humanity in his presence) more likely than not fled his physique.

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Post by mujason » Sat Dec 02, 2006 5:54 pm

At least mine goes after the right gender. Homosexuality is a sin and those who do not repent of it (like those who do not repent of other sins) are going to hell (which looks a lot like the ku campus).

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Post by scphilli » Sat Dec 02, 2006 8:50 pm

mujason wrote: At least mine goes after the right gender. Homosexuality is a sin and those who do not repent of it (like those who do not repent of other sins) are going to hell (which looks a lot like the ku campus).
Yours may go after the "right" gender, but that gender doesn't want you. Not even as a pet. Mine wants me as a husband, and that's one thing your ppg can never get you: a loving, meaningful relationship with another human being.

As for sins, guess what else is? PRIDE! Guess what else is a sin? Touching a woman during her period and eating shrimp! Now I know you've not done the former (at least not with her permission), but almost all of us have done the latter. So don't posture as if you are somehow Jesus and have done nothing wrong. Why don't you go back to doing what you do best: living in your parent's basement, infrequently emerging to troll for quizbowl girls who have no interest in you, bigot.

P.S. You're going to die a lonely virgin.

P.P.S. I'll wait for you in Hell, where Satan will no doubt sodomize you with a ZeeCraft after he ties you up with one of them Gordian knot systems.


P.P.P.S. God hates it when you use his name to sanction hate.

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Post by mujason » Sat Dec 02, 2006 9:35 pm

Just for the record, I don't eat shrimp. I also know that I'm not perfect. Also, I'm not going to hell because I know that Jesus died for me (and you and everyone else, too) and that He will forgive me for my many wrongs. Even though I am on pace to die a lonely virgin, things can always turn around. Also, even though I may sound like a member of the religious right, I voted all Democrat last election.

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Post by L-Town Expatriate » Sun Dec 03, 2006 2:49 am

mujason wrote: Just for the record, I don't eat shrimp.  I also know that I'm not perfect.  Also, I'm not going to hell because I know that Jesus died for me (and you and everyone else, too) and that He will forgive me for my many wrongs.  Even though I am on pace to die a lonely virgin, things can always turn around.  Also, even though I may sound like a member of the religious right, I voted all Democrat last election.
I never thought I'd see Jason attempt to proselytize.








:huh:

Oh, and according to the latest round of Google ads: Melissa 2, Jason 1, photographers 1

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Post by mujason » Sun Dec 03, 2006 10:07 am

The photographer is named Jason, so it's technically tied at 2.

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Post by scphilli » Sun Dec 03, 2006 10:59 am

mujason wrote: Just for the record, I don't eat shrimp. I also know that I'm not perfect. Also, I'm not going to hell because I know that Jesus died for me (and you and everyone else, too) and that He will forgive me for my many wrongs. Even though I am on pace to die a lonely virgin, things can always turn around. Also, even though I may sound like a member of the religious right, I voted all Democrat last election.
Yeah, I'm sure Michael Richards voted Democrat too. It doesn't make you any better a person, no matter how you try to salve your guilt. It's really too bad you have the consistency of a bowl of mashed potatoes. You MIGHT be useful otherwise.

P.S. You are STILL going to die a lonely virgin.

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Post by LibertyMarie » Sun Dec 03, 2006 1:09 pm

i'm friends with michael richards.

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Post by mujason » Sun Dec 03, 2006 3:20 pm

Why would Michael Richards (the Seinfeld actor, not the former Liberty all-stater) vote Democrat when about 90% of African-Americans vote Democrat?

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Post by LibertyMarie » Sun Dec 03, 2006 6:50 pm

why can't we be friends, why can't we be friends...
seriously, people, let's not be hateful.

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Post by MikeWormdog » Sun Dec 03, 2006 8:49 pm

Since it's only gender that affects you (and not sex), Jason, what about men living as women or men in the process of becoming women? That might be a segment of society you could look into.

Also, I would wager that Jason wasn't much better than Jon was in high school, 2A record or not. Had Jon not been ill for much of his senior year, it could have been a different story. If 18-year-old Jason and 18-year-old Jon played on decent questions that weren't math-heavy, then I would bet against Jason. Jon was a great history/lit player by his senior year.

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Post by mujason » Sun Dec 03, 2006 11:56 pm

Mike, I'm not becoming a woman and I'm not interested in anybody who isn't a real woman, no matter how many tossups "she" gets. Just remember that the 18-year-old me (actually, the day before my 19th birthday) just missed beating Andy in the Chicago Open singles tournament. Of course, I was extremely raw back in high school, as I only got to play in 20 matches. Too bad I was stuck at a crappy program; with a full tournament schedule, I would have had enough experience to win a state title and build enough street cred to get on the Panasonic team.

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Post by LibertyMarie » Mon Dec 04, 2006 9:20 am

lalalalala....

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Post by Charlie Dees » Mon Dec 04, 2006 2:50 pm

It's wonderful to see someone (Jason) who is no more mature in his twenties than he probably was when he was 10. I'm tempted to say there has actually been some notable regression in his case.

As the venerable Traiberman once said:
"Speaking of virgins..."

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Post by ajax » Tue Jan 16, 2007 12:24 am

Jason's Law: Turn to religion, if your sex life doesn't pan out.

Image
Jason's eventual role in society

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Post by DeckardCain » Tue Jan 16, 2007 12:37 am

I'm getting rid of this thread.

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